July 12, 2017
Tired of Anxiety? Try EFT
Experiencing a small amount of anxiety occasionally is actually very adaptive and helpful. A few butterflies in my stomach before public speaking helps me keep my edge and be alert. Chronic anxiety, panic, or debilitating feelings of terror however, are not helpful and actually harm your mind and body over time.
Chronic anxiety actually rewires your brain. When the fight, flight or freeze response in your body and brain is constantly being activated, your body and brain learn a new way of operating, becoming hypervigilant and on edge . If you’ve been following along on the blog and my YouTube Channel you know I’ve been demonstrating and blogging about techniques to use to, over time, reduce the triggering of the fight or flight response. I think EFT can be another helpful tool.
Begin by identifying where in your body your are feeling the anxiety. Do you have butterflies in your stomach, a racing heart, a lump in your throat, heaviness in your chest? Once you tune in to your body’s experience with the anxiety, rate the amount of it on a scale of 1-10.
Take a deep breath in, let it out.
Karate Chop: “Even though I feel this anxiety in my (chest, stomach, head), I deeply and completely love and accept myself.”
Karate Chop: “Even though I’m feeling so very anxious right now, I am open to learning to accept whatever emotions I’m experiencing.”
Karate Chop: “Even though sometimes it’s hard to love and accept myself when I’m feeling all this anxiety, I love and accept how I feel about this and am open to feeling more calm.”
Top of Head: “This anxiety in my (chest, stomach, head).”
Eyebrow: “This fear I feel in my body feels overwhelming.”
Side of Eye: “I love and accept my willingness to release these emotions.”
Under the Eye: “This anxiety makes me feel out of control.”
Under the Nose: “I am open to releasing this anxiety in my body.”
Chin: “Anxiety doesn’t feel safe.”
Collarbone: “I am releasing the anxiety in my body.”
Under the Arm: “I know what it feels like to feel calm.”
Top of Head: “I am allowing my body to feel calm.”
Take a deep breath in, re-rate the level of anxiety in your body on a scale of 1-10. Repeat the tapping as needed until you notice the level has decreased to at least a “2”, changing the wording to fit the level of anxiety.
I hope you have found the EFT helpful and are using it as another tool in your therapy toolbox!
Be Well and Have a Wonderful Day!
July 5, 2017
All You Need Is Love…
The song says that all we need is love, but for many people love is a word that comes with all sorts of baggage. The definition of love according to the Merriam-Webster dictionary is “an intense feeling of deep affection.” What if we were raised in an environment where our care givers were over worked, tired, depressed, busy doing other things, etc.? Would they have had time to show us deep affection? Maybe you did have that feeling of deep affection from your parents, but then something happened later on that left you feeling disconnected, closed off from others, believing you had to do life “all on your own.”
For whatever the reason, some people find it difficult to feel deep affection from others and really struggle with the idea of feeling deeply affectionate toward themselves. If you’ve been tapping and following along on YouTube and here on my blog, you know that I’m giving you some scripts to help with the “I love and accept myself” part of the EFT statement. So far we’ve addressed safety and value, but what about that pesky love word?
I think first we have to be open to allowing ourselves to feel love, that deep affection, then we might be more willing to aim some of it at ourselves.
Take a deep breath in; rate the amount of anxiety, nervousness or fear you have about allowing more love into your life.
Karate Chop: “Even though it feels (scary, frightening) to allow myself to feel love, I know that I would enjoy it and I’m open to allowing a little more love into my life everyday.” (repeat 3 times)
Top of Head: “I don’t really allow love into my life very deeply.”
Eyebrow: “Maybe I can ask (God, the Universe, my Higher Power) to help me to allow love into my life.”
Side of the Eye: “I thought I was suppose to guard myself, maybe it’s not safe to let love in.”
Under the Eye: “I really do want to learn that I’m loved and lovable.”
Chin: “I really could use some help learning how to let love flow into my heart.”
Collarbone: “I want to feel loved, safe, and accepted.”
Under the Arm: ” I can just relax and allow love in and see what happens.”
Top of Head: “I do know that I am loved by ________ and that feels good.”
Take a Deep breath in, rate your level of fear, nervousness, anxiety. Repeat the tapping changing the phrases to what fits as your fear decreases.
I am open to allowing more love in my life and having deep affection for myself. How about you?
Be Well and Have a Wonderful Day!
July 3, 2017
Tips for Amazing Summer Self Care
(from the National Eating Disorders Association, Grace Bradley)
1. Remember: EVERY body is a beach body! Do you have a body? Yes. Are you at the beach? If the answer is yes, then there you have it: a beach body. That’s all you need.
2. You are good enough. Ignore those magazines that tell you what you need to do to your body to get ready for the season. You don’t need to change a thing about yourself to enjoy your summer.
3. Get outside. There is more sunlight to indulge in during the summertime. Whether it’s sitting outside and enjoying a good book, going for a walk in your local park or getting to the beach, enjoy the incredible weather! Before you know it, you’ll be back in the office or classroom, so take advantage of the sunshine while you can.
4. Wear more sunscreen. Granted, you should be wearing it all year-round, but really slather it on this season. I am not ashamed of my devotion to my SPF 100.
5. Go off the grid for a bit. I used to attend a camp where electronics were prohibited and I loved it. Stepping away from social media, toxic messages, and just the impersonal way technology has us talking to each other was incredible. Even if it’s putting your phone on airplane mode for a bit of the day, you won’t be worried about what’s going on in that little phone of yours and instead you’ll enjoy the vast world around you.
6. Don’t compare yourself to others. Getting off the grid helps you avoid comparing yourself to others. All of those images of models on the beach? That’s distorted reality. As long as you are enjoying yourself and how you are spending your summer, that’s all that matters.
7. Be kind, especially to yourself. Being kind to yourself allows you to spend more time focusing on enjoying your summer and spreading that same kindness to others. You deserve nothing but kindness, and yes, it does spread like wildfire.
8. Watch your language. What are you saying about yourself? Hopefully it’s positive language. Understandably, we all have those days where we just don’t feel our best and we can say some pretty harsh things about ourselves. Don’t worry if you do, just be aware of it and think about what you can say next time.
9. Surround yourself with people who make you feel good.Summer is short and precious, so spend it with people who lift you up and bring out the best version of you.
10. Wear what makes you feel beautiful and confident. Don’t adhere to fashion trends if they don’t make you feel good. Put things on your body that make you feel incredible, powerful and on top of the world. You deserve nothing less than to feel like that every day.
11. Make time for the things you love to do. It’s your summer, so spend it wisely. Even if you have a packed schedule, make time each day to do something you love, whether that’s reading your book, watching Netflix, attempting to learn how to play the ukulele, anything!
12. Allow yourself to relax and unwind. We all re-energize in different ways. Some people need alone time and others need to be with others. Whatever your setting, remember it’s okay to devote time to taking care of yourself. Take a nap, a bath, or go out with your friends.
13. Try something new. A new hobby, new recipe, new book, new hiking spot, doesn’t matter. Every day is an opportunity to try something new and every day is a new opportunity.
14. Drink more water. Be kind to your body and soul and keep yourself hydrated all summer long.
15. Go stargazing. When I worked in Maine, my favorite thing to do was to lie on the dock at the lake and just stare into the vastness of the night sky, counting the shooting stars with my friends. It sounds cheesy, but seeing just how big the night sky was and all that was happening in it gave me perspective on my own life.
16. Make a bucket list for the summer, and stick to it! What do you want to do this summer? Write it down and make a goal of it to cross something off that list as often as possible! Make memories that turn into great stories.
17. Remind yourself of what your body can do this summer.Your body can do so much! It helps you swim, hike, laugh, love, smile, and hug. Appreciate your body for all of the wonderful things it can do instead of dwelling on what you wish it looked like.
18. Start each day with a gratitude list. It doesn’t have to be long, but jotting down just a few things each morning about what you’re grateful for in your life starts your day off on a great note.
19. First thing in the morning, make your bed. It took me a really long time to adopt this habit, but now I can’t imagine a day without it. It’s a simple task that can be accomplished at the very start of the day.
20. Try meditating. Whether it’s five minutes or 50 minutes, just taking some time out of the day to sit and clear your mind is so wonderful. You begin to realize just how powerful a simple breath is.
Kelly F. Dennis MS LPC 