February 15, 2011

Compassion: The Nasty Girl Despises It!

Posted in Uncategorized at 3:36 pm by kellyfdennis

Some say that the essence of self-esteem is compassion for yourself. When you have compassion for yourself, you understand and accept yourself.  Does that mean is OK when you do something that is truly against your values and beliefs?  No, but you can accept that as a human being you make mistakes.  Instead of ignoring your pain when you are having a difficult time, when you believe you have failed or notice something you don’t like about yourself, compassion for oneself involves recognizing and admitting “This is hard right now. How can I care and comfort myself in a healthy, functional way in this moment? How can I learn from this mistake without berating myself for it?” Compassion for self involves kindness and understanding when confronted with your own shortcomings. Things will not always go the way we want them to; we will encounter frustrations, losses, discover our own limitations. This is part of the human condition…we cannot be perfect! The more we accept and understand this, the more we can have compassion for ourselves.

When we can allow ourselves to feel compassion toward ourselves, we discover how to really feel compassion for others.  We will notice when another person is suffering, we will feel more compelled to gain understanding of the other person, thereby accepting them rather than judging or condemning them. We will realize that others cannot not achieve perfection either and may fail, reject us, or hurt us in some way occasionally. When we operate in the world with a compassionate mind, we recognize that we are all trying to get our needs met in one way or another; we all have beliefs or awareness (or perhaps limited awareness) that influence our behavior in the moment; and we all have experienced pain and hurt.

How would your life be different if you could think of yourself, your behaviors, your mistakes as well as the mistakes of others from a place of understanding, acceptance, and forgiveness…the Nasty Girl inside your head would be gone.

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stefdennis

ponderings on life, food, God, and love

Grace on the Moon

Do Not Weigh Your Self-Esteem on a Scale

on anything and everything

my thoughts on what I see

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